Tag Archives: Sadness
I Can’t Believe It Either, But It’s Been A Year Or I Did It, How Do You Like Them Apples?
One year ago I thought it might be fun to start a blog where I wrote terrible ideas for books and movies and TV shows and really anything that popped into my head every single day for a year. Yes, I had just watched Julie and Julia and thought it is probably a heck of a lot easier to blog every day than to make every recipe in Julia Child’s cookbook. And just like that a blog was born.
I thought at the time that this blog would be a way to escape, to run away from myself, to finally do something from start to finish. To be honest, I didn’t think I’d make it past a few weeks. Like much I do in life, I figured I’d get bored or second guess myself or flat out be too lazy to stick with it but for some odd reason I felt compelled to finish. After awhile I stopped thinking I was writing to run away from myself but realized I was writing to find myself. Yeah, I know how corny that sounds. It’s like this quote I love “One fish, Two fish, Red fish, Blue fish” wait that’s not the one it’s “with writing we get second chances”. That’s what this was for me- It was my second chance to do something for the first time: follow through. Now I know not every day was a readable entry but that wasn’t really the point now was it?
So thank you for sticking it out. Thank you for dropping by. Thank you for not posting incredibly disheartening comments forever condeming me to a life devoid of follow through and empty dreams. I’m not leaving this blog forever but I am leaving it for now. It served its purpose.
I’d love to be able to tell you that this was a stepping stone to that novel I have half written on my laptop or the play I have the ending written but nothing else. Truth is, I don’t know what’s next. I do know that there is something, somewhere that will also get finished. Maybe my play will finally get some rising action instead of just a killer finale. Maybe one of my Rejected Book Plots will get flushed out and become an Accepted Book Plot. Maybe I’ll start a new blog called Accepted Book Plots where every day I will tell you the plot of something that has already been published until the authors get mad and shut it down. Or maybe you’ll never see another word written by me again. Maybe you will.
I know this for certain: it has only just begun.
Thanks for the memories! Keep In Touch! Have a nice summer! It was so great having Bio with you! Stay Sweet! I’m the first one to sign in your crack!
To Quote A Genius
I feel like if I were to write a book about sadness it would just be me, quoting Jonathan Safran Foer all night long. And well into the next day. So without further ado, the best excerpt on sadness ever:
“He awoke each morning with the desire to do right, to be a good and meaningful person, to be, as simple as it sounded and as impossible as it actually was, happy. And during the course of each day his heart would descend from his chest into his stomach. By early afternoon he was overcome by the feeling that nothing was right, or nothing was right for him, and by the desire to be alone. By evening he was fulfilled: alone in the magnitude of his grief, alone in his aimless guilt, alone even in his loneliness. I am not sad, he would repeat to himself over and over, I am not sad. As if he might one day convince himself. Or fool himself. Or convince others–the only thing worse than being sad is for others to know that you are sad. I am not sad. I am not sad. Because his life had unlimited potential for happiness, insofar as it was an empty white room. He would fall asleep with his heart at the foot of his bed, like some domesticated animal that was no part of him at all. And each morning he would wake with it again in the cupboard of his rib cage, having become a little heavier, a little weaker, but still pumping. And by the midafternoon he was again overcome with the desire to be somewhere else, someone else, someone else somewhere else. I am not sad.”
…Right? Soooo good.
I’ll get back to writing book plots soon, I swear. It’s been a weird week. Give me a break, dearest internet.
The Sadness Paradox
You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Well jump on, enjoy, you can gorge away
There is nothing Ben wouldn’t do for his love Emily. So when he saw her slipping into a crippling depression he knew he had to do something. Ben comes from a VERY long line of inventors so he knew if anyone was going to be able to invent a machine that you could breathe into and it would swallow your sadness and spit out delicious ice cream it would be him! So after years of trial and error, Ben finally perfected the machine. Only thing he didn’t realize was how much the world needed this machine. Everyone from The President to Joe Six-Pack to The Mob wanted to get their hands on the sadness swallowing machine but there was only one causing a great panic and an even greater amount of sadness in the world for those who couldn’t get their hands on it.
The Sadness Paradox is a thrilling tale of just how far some people will go to keep others from pain while being able to eat your feelings, literally. At the end of the day, who will end up with the machine? Will the FDA ever approve sorrow filled ice cream? How many calories are in a large depression? You’ve never read a story like this! Murder, Mystery, Intrigue, Suspense!!
You May Not Know It, But We’re in a Fight: Tales From Your Passive Aggressive Friend
You’d never know it seeing her interact, but Elizabeth is an extreme introvert. The idea of meeting new people actively gives her panic attacks. It is such a problem that often before going out she hyperventilates and cries in the fetal position. Yet, she is so loud and outgoing in front of the people she knows that they often forget. Liz is also an extreme people pleaser. She hates the idea of letting people down or them being mad at her so much that she almost never says no. Liz’s friends are well aware she can’t say no and they often use this to their advantage. The thing Elizabeth’s friends don’t realize is that she’s well aware of every time she is being manipulated into doing something she doesn’t want to do and is making lists of her own.
Liz has spent years having one-sided arguments with her friends in front of her mirror trying to work up the courage to actually tell them how she feels. She knew she’d never be able to actually tell them why she was so upset because she couldn’t knowingly hurt her friends. So she would internalize it. She buried the pain deep until it burrowed little holes in her chest where any hope and happiness she had leaked out. She would do silly little things that made her feel better like not respond to a text message but then she’d feel guilty and respond anyway. While all her friends were living their lives, Liz was just trying to survive.
Liz’s life was a constant struggle between love and hate. She hated most things but never wanted to be the downer in the group so would pretend to love them. In her mind nothing was worse than the person in a circle of friends who was always super negative. So she would pretend the world was fine, her life was good and at the end of the day she was happy. She strived every day to be happy and make it better than the day before. She often failed at this task so she decided she would just strive to pretend to be better. If you pretend something long enough, it becomes true to you. Perception is reality, after all.
Will Liz ever tell her friends how she feels? Will she ever be able to stop pretending to be happy and just be happy?
“I am always sad, I think. Perhaps this signifies that I am not sad at all, because sadness is something lower than your normal disposition, and I am always the same thing. Perhaps I am the only person in the world, then, who never becomes sad. Perhaps I am lucky.” ~Jonathan Safran Foer