October 16, 2011 Rejected Book Plot #199
A Pack of Lions Watch The Lion King 3D Only To Realize How Unrealistic It Is… in 2D
“Mama, why would a lion be the king to the hyenas? Isn’t that kind of like a sweater ruling over shorts? I mean, why would the shorts listen to the sweater- they have nothing in common!”
I don’t know, son.
“Mama, why don’t we have a bird who watches over the land and reports back to us? It is like a butler in the sky.”
Union dispute, son.
“Mama, why didn’t I go live with a meercat and a warthog who sing about farting? According to this movie that is what you do when you are a young cub who gets duped into believe he killed his father only to learn he didn’t and he must fight his uncle and take control back of the land because the uncle is a terrible farmer.”
I wish you would, son.
“Mama, is uncle Pete gonna murder daddy and cover it with a stampede?”
A Pack of Lions Watch The Lion King 3D Only To Realize How Unrealistic It Is… in 2D is a story unlike any other. Part Mystery Science Theatre where the robot and guy watch the movie and make commentary about it mixed with part- you know what? It is exactly Mystery Science Theatre but about lions and The Lion King and instead of robots it is a cub who doesn’t understand what fiction is. Also, the dad lion falls asleep about a third of the way in and snores pret-ty loud.