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Rejected Book Plots

Not every book can be the next Twilight

A Less Heartbreaking Work of Exaggerated Genius

Turns out Dave Eggers isn’t the only one who can write a brilliant novel based on his tragic life laced with humor and intelligence but this story isn’t it. Max never had to watch his parents die from cancer months apart from each other while his father’s death was quick and unexpected but his mother’s was slow and heartbreaking. Max was never forced to raise his younger brother because his older brother was too busy and his sister couldn’t handle it. Max never tried out for The Real World, although he did try out for Road Rules. Max did, however, have a loving family and an extremely high G.P.A.. Max had an irrationally inaccurate sense of self. With his father always calling him Champ what else was he supposed to think he was? The biggest problem Max ever faced was not being able to choose which car to take his Homecoming Date in (he ended up switching after dinner so he didn’t end up choosing at all and got pret-ty laid with all his money and nice things). Max smoked a joint once. This is as far as his worldly experience went. He once tried to join a theatre group because it would look good on his college application but the smell of grease paint and disappointment was more than he could bare.

A Less Heartbreaking Work of Exaggerated Genius is the story of one man who read A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius and wanted to emulate the perfectness but didn’t have any experiences worth writing about so made a lot of them up. Now with more robots and white people problems!


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